making long-distance work

If I’ve only learned one thing this past year, it’s easy to pinpoint exactly what it is.

Long distance relationships take work.

Yeah, I know. Most people probably think that’s a given, but seriously, there’s so much more to it.

When you’re in a long-distance relationship, you have to learn very quickly how to communicate well.

Texts can be misconstrued. Facebook is shallow. And, the lack of face time can really hurt.

But, if you learn to transcend those obstacles, you’ll be stronger than ever.

You’ve probably heard of the “honeymoon phase” of a relationship.

Both parties are blissfully unaware of the others’ faults, and everything is kosher.

Eventually though, we discover those little details, and we decided whether we can move past them.

With long distance rearing its ugly head,

Ryan and I hit the end of that honeymoon phase within a few months.

We definitely had something, but having come out of a failed relationship before, I was guarded.

Ryan and I actually broke up for a few weeks at that point.

Now, for some, that’s a warning sign.

For me, it was a wakeup call.

Not having someone to call in the wee hours of the morning hurt my heart.

Missing those funny Facetime conversations that left me laughing for hours hurt my soul.

I quickly discovered something amazing:

 I missed my best friend

Those few weeks made Ryan and I really re-evaluate what we were looking for.

It made me look within myself and find out why I was so guarded.

It made us learn to communicate more effectively.

It taught us to validate each other more than we might have in person.

Most of all though, it taught us that we could make this work because we wanted it to.

I’d be lying if I said that long distance relationships don’t suck.

Because they really, really do.

But here’s the thing.

You can make your long distance relationship work FOR you.

Every relationship takes work, passion, commitment and caring. 

Without having your loved one in person means you need to commit yourself tenfold.

If you can do that, and you can do so willingly and happily,

You, as a couple, can do anything.

And, in that way, long distance relationships can actually bring you closer.