those predeployment feels

The predeployment clock is ticking and, as many military families can attest, the days are both dragging and flying. It’s simultaneously super sucky and fantastic. On the one hand, we’re blessed to have more time with Ryan, as his schedule is loosening up in preparation for his departure. On the other hand, the time is going way too fast, and we find ourselves struggling to find a balance between getting things done and enjoying this time together.

We’re doing our best to stay on the positive side of the coin though, and we’re just keeping all things status quo here during this predeployment madness. We signed the boys up for their next round of swim lessons, which start this weekend. You may remember that we started them while Ryan was TDY this summer, and we’re excited to keep the rhythm going for these little future fishies. We’re slowly working through the house with our KonMari goals, so that we have a better leg up on this upcoming move. We’re exploring the beautiful PNW and enjoying when the sun shows its shiny face. Basically, we’re trucking along.

Ryan and I always roll our eyes when people refer to something as a “season of life,” but seriously, it fits. This season is hard, and it’s trying, but it’s also one we’re working to enjoy together because these little boys are going to remember these moments. Predeployment is no joke. It’s like a band-aid that you desperately want to rip off, but it’s verrrrry slowly being removed by an unskilled hand. It’s like watching a loved one leave…long and drawn out. It’s also what you make of it though, and I’m trying to remember that.

I remember the last time Ryan deployed that we fought a lot before he left. I later read on one of my favorite milspo blogs that it’s actually a coping mechanism. Spouses aren’t trying to pick fights, and their anger is usually not actually directed towards their soldier. It’s anger at the situation. It’s frustration about the reality of deployment hardships. I think I’m going into this with a steadier hand even though this deployment will definitely have its share of challenges, as well.

For today, however, we’re enjoying it all – chaos included. Regardless of the hardships, this time is what we make of it. So, cheers to the weekend, all the feelings, all the fun, and (hopefully) some sunshine?!