When we first had Spencer back in 2014, we were (naturally) clueless. For some reason, I had this notion that one little baby couldn’t possibly be that hard. Sure, there would be the adjustment period in which we’d all need to find our rhythm, but our lives would continue on as usual, right? Wrong. As much as I glossed things over in my posts back during that year, I can read between the lines and feel the exhaustion and frenetic energy in every word. We were struggling. Spencer wasn’t a good sleeper. We floundered, and we honestly considered him being our one and only child.
Fast forward to 2019, and I’m here in Washington – solo, mind you – with three children. And yet, instead of feeling overwhelmed by an incessant frantic energy, being a mom of three is, dare I say, not too bad? Beyond that, while chaotic and messy, it’s actually beautiful, and I find I almost have more to give than I did when we had just one child.
Take, for example, this past weekend at Summer Cove. I took the boys to the beach with a friend, and Mieke lost her marbles. It was hot and sticky, she was overstimulated, hungry, and needed a nap, but she worked herself into a frenzy that she couldn’t seem to come down from. Back when we had just one child, that would have been grounds for a hasty exit. This time, however, the boys continued to play. I sat in the tent, patted her back, fed her as best I could, laughed through the cries of a fussy baby, then packed her naked little self into the carrier and took a dip in the cool water, carrier and all.
Being a mom of three is nonstop. It’s exhausting and, at times, it’s completely overwhelming. The days can feel insanely long, and the bed time is often the one moment where I can finally let out that deep breath I’ve been holding all day.
There’s also a near immeasurable amount of joy to it though. Seeing Spencer love on his little sister, watching my boys play contentedly while I nurse a baby or clean the kitchen; those are the little moments that fuel me through the harder moments. While we definitely had our inevitable adjustment period, we also found a rhythm that worked for us. It meant finding time for them as individuals, as well as encouraging my big boys to help me with their little sister. In that, they found a bit of growth and a sense of independence they didn’t know before.
I don’t remember what life was before being a mom of three. Truthfully. I used to find myself overwhelmed by needing to do laundry with one baby. Now I do laundry with three whilst juggling meal-prep, swim lessons, and gymnastics. Am I tired? Hell yes. Exhausted. But, like many things, this time is what I make of it. So, yes. I’ll be bold. I’ll do more things. I laugh through the tantrums and, at times, I lose my cool. But being a mom of three is about grace on all our parts, and we’re finding it in all the little moments these days.
